So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
