I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
dude i'm inner monologue high
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
