were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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