why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize