3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
