spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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