For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
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