Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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