I just made out with a guy for $7.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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