Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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