So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
