why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
