is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
