I could have mohawked her pubes.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
