I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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