Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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