bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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