you told grandpa to call you daddy
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
