He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
