GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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