these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
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