In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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