What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Randomize
