there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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