The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
