Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize