some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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