Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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