I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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