what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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