To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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