sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
