yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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