Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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