pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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