Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
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