He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
we should paint friendship bongs
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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