How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Randomize