Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
