I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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