My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
