worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
