There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize