How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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