i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize