Having a random hookup so left but love u
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
