You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize