Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Randomize