If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
