Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Randomize