Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
